The Kingdom-Driven Family

A number of friends contacted me with frustration lately, because they discovered that a number of women from their churches participated, in person, at one of the many Women’s Marches around the country. What’s more, these same women were distressed because a good number of the women who marched expressed sadness about the outcome of the 2016 presidential election.

Why were my friends upset? My guess is that they assumed that the other women in their church thought as they did regarding various “women’s issues,” such as abortion and feminism, and were shocked to see their church friends reacting much like the mainstream media when their candidate lost the election. As the expression goes, “When you assume, you make an ass of you and me (ass of u and me).

The mistake we all can make is to accept the categories we are given by the culture, and thereby believe every woman who turned out to these marches was in full agreement with the talking heads and celebrities who were given airtime. It is faulty to assume that every woman who participated wants to kill an unborn child. While many who attended might well have had abortions in their past, maybe they were marching because they desperately want to see justice prevail against fathers who committed incest with them, or men who used and then abandoned them when they got pregnant, or men who raped them and got off scott free. We need to realize that there are legitimate concerns that women have and that they need to be addressed Biblically and presuppositionally. While it is true that many women are blind to areas where they are culpable for inflicting an injustice upon another (killing of their unborn child), we need to remember that Scripture says, “Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.” As we engage one-on-one with those we encounter, we will accomplish much more than gathering large crowds in the public square to make our point. We need to uncover why they believe the way they do.

Many women are sexually victimized because the surrounding culture promotes a casual attitude about sexual offenses. I think many people would be astounded to know how prevalent sexual sins occur in what appear to be good, Christian families. Moreover, if those victimized become rebellious and turn from their upbringing, we assume the blame belongs on the child, without considering that something dreadful may have precipitated the rebellion. More focus is given to changing the behavior of the rebellious child, never giving full attention as to why a child in a Christian family might act out in such a way. I have spoken with a number of young women who grew up with a father or a brother who repeatedly violated them sexually. More often than not, they felt they had little to no recourse. Who would they tell? Who would believe them? What would happen after it was revealed?  With little apparent recourse, they sometimes went “wild.”

Sadly, most of them kept quiet, until they were in a position to no longer be sinned against by the family member. Then, often years later, when they brought the truth to light, others in their churches or families told them to “get over it” because it happened so long ago. However, one does not “get over” sin. One must deal with sin and it should be dealt with according to God’s directives. In many cases, the reputation and perception of the particular church with the offending member was deemed of greater importance than seeing justice served.  Having abandoned God’s Word and the need for the civil government’s jurisdictional intervention, injustice prevailed.[1]

To what do we owe this phenomenon? The modern church has focused on being a body of “New Testament” believers and avoided, abandoned, or nullified the Old Testament Mosaic law. As a result, it has become open season on cheap forgiveness and winking at sin. When denominations reinstate adulterous pastors to ministry, and elders and church boards instruct women who were violated to “move on,” what hope is there to stop this epidemic? Moreover, when pulpits do not teach God’s law and address cultural issues in light of that law, and dismiss children and young people to “children’s church” or “youth church,” it is easy for sin to continue on a family level.  After all, the status quo eliminates an environment where the entire family is hearing God’s law preached completely.

There is another saying that goes, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure! I can only wonder how many of the young women sexually abused would have appreciated knowing that what their fathers or brothers were doing to them was wrong, and would have found other people who knew the Biblical mandates to help them escape their nightmarish situations. If you think this is not a real problem, you have allowed yourself to be an ostrich with your head in the sand.

The early church had to deal with converted pagans who came to faith with lots of sinful baggage. How did the church deal with it?  — by preaching the full-counsel of God and demanding that one’s fruits be evidence of one’s conversion. We can tackle this blight only when we return to the source of justice—God’s law —learned, lived, applied, and upheld.

 

[1] It should also be noted that the Biblical mandate for a woman to cry out in the case of sexual rape or assault (Deut. 22) is rarely taught or followed. Thus, it can be easy for a woman to report falsely about a non-existent offense from years prior, and never face the consequences of perjury when/if she be found to be lying. The law of God addresses both true and false accusations.