If you are like me, you have many projects around your home waiting to be dealt with. Whether it is a messy room, a closet that hasn’t been arranged in a decade or so, or a bathroom cabinet with all sorts of outdated content, the thought of someone other than your family getting a look at one of these terrifies you. Then, one day, you become motivated to deal with a project and tackle it.
For me, there is a mixture of horror and being proud of myself. Horror that I let things get so dirty and disorganized, and a sense of pride that I am finally engaged. My “perfectionist” persona appears at this point and I focus on minute details that extend over and above what a professional cleaning service might deem important. In other words, after years of neglect I am going to right all wrongs. The problem is that what ends up happening is that I forget about staying on top of the job for another ten years.
During these times I ask myself: Why can’t I be more organized? Why can’t my home look like the ones in decorating magazines? Why can’t I get my priorities in order? In these private moments, between God and me, I strive to be honest with myself. I’ve come to the conclusion that during my years as a homeschooling mom, I had to sacrifice being a superlative homemaker. Maybe there are those who can do it all, but I wasn’t one of them. Now that I don’t have children to teach, carpool, or supervise, etc., I have the time to notice and deal with areas that need attention. The lie is that we can do it all.
Think about it. In a school setting, an individual teacher is not also the school chef, the janitor, the librarian, or the bus driver. How easy it is for us to forget that when we choose the home education route, we are making a decision based on priorities, not because we are superwomen. We must remember that our primary audience is the Triune God and that we need to use His standards in judging how well we are or aren’t doing.
If we find that joy is regularly missing from life, we are not on the right track and a course correction needs to take place. We need to remember that it is not about the house, or the kids, or the sports, or a myriad of other things. It’s about the Kingdom of God and our place in it. We are only a part of the story that God has written. We should relish the privilege of being a part of that story. When we put His Kingdom first, all the other matters fall into place.